There are many benefits to being a parent. Think for a moment of some that top your list. One benefit that I recently witnessed was the experience of watching my kids make each other laugh. I love seeing my kids interact in a way that is focused on maximizing fun. We were recently at a new ’splash pad’ in our neighborhood and our oldest two, Beaudry and Braunson, spent the entire time in a state of smiles and laughter. They were surrounded by other kids, including their siblings, but they were in their own way alone in their own world. This happens often and sometimes serves as a problem, but in moments like the spash pad it reminds me of the benefits of having someone be so close. In all that they do, they seem to find a way to do it together.
Our marriages should be like the relationship between Braunson and Beaudry. We should have a closeness that enables us to be all alone even when standing in a crowd. We should have an openness that leads to laugther, smiles, and constant touching. We should work to stand together as a united team as we face the challenges of our day. I find that many couples fight against one another rather than fighting as one team against a given situation or problem. Standing together means taking each others side, being equal partners, and having a similar goal. Standing together means being close and supporting each other in their part of the work. Standing together means holding each other up when the other needs encouragement.
From the literature on Attachment theory we take a different approach to our view on life and challenges. Often you will hear people say life isn’t about winning or losing, it’s how you play the game. From an attachment perspective, we believe life isn’t about winning or losing, it’s about who you play with. Standing together means facing life with the one who matters most.